In a RuPaul’s Drag Race season, there’s one queen who racks up a couple of wins in the first few episodes, drawing RuPaul’s affection. They never quite achieve that same level of success in the back half—a win at the end, maybe, or just a couple of high placements—but Ru stays interested in them. However, another queen starts scoring wins left and right, dominating the competition in the back half. It seems clear that she’s got the momentum going into the finale … and then the early favourite takes it instead.
You’d think I’m talking about early Drag Race UK seasons, right? Both Lawrence Chaney’s victory over Bimini and Krystal Versace’s over Ella Vaday follow this trajectory, to the point that the first result shocked me, and I correctly predicted the second based on it. But the same description applies to both of this year’s RuPaul’s Drag Race U.S. seasons. Nymphia Wind’s strong first impression led both Ru and fans to continue to favour her even after Sapphira Cristál racked up a record three wins in a row, and Nymphia ultimately took home the crown.
For All Stars 9, we have a similar dynamic with Angeria Paris VanMicheals and Roxxxy Andrews. It’s not an exact fit, as Angeria picked up two wins mid-season after winning the premiere. But certainly Roxxxy had the momentum after her design challenge and LaLaPaRuZa wins in the back half of the season. She was guaranteed a spot in the Lip Sync for the Crown going into the finale—give or take a wacky twist—while Angeria needed either a variety show victory or the Double Diamond to get into the final three. I’d argue several queens had stronger momentum heading into the finale, be it Plastique Tiara with her four wins or Shannel with her last-minute hot streak.
Yet in the end, after Angeria and Roxxxy lip synced against Vanessa Vanjie for the crown—more on how we got there in a second—it was Angeria who won it all. Tremendous congratulations to our new entrant in the Drag Race Hall of Fame! Angeria is a magnificent queen, and she deserves this crown. But as was the case with Lawrence, Krystal and Nymphia, Angeria deserved a season that told the story of her win better, because many a Roxxxy fan is (understandably!) upset with this result. And as someone who has literally made a career out of analyzing this show, I’m left pretty perplexed by the decision-making that’s led us here.
Let’s flash back to the start of the episode, which opens with a special message from U.S. Vice President Kamala Harris promoting voting. She has a coterie of random celebrities surrounding her (Michelle Visage, Jamal Sims, Leslie Jones, Cheyenne Jackson and Lance Bass) who mostly stay silent as she speaks. There’s a cute moment at the end when Leslie lifts an upside-down vote.gov sign, which triggers a signature Kamala laugh. But mostly I’m impressed by the absolute kismet of this moment. No, it’s not quite as shocking as it would’ve been if this was actually filmed a year before (it was filmed about a month ago), but still! The timing!
After that ending, we have an extended werk room segment, part of which features a lot of recap of the season. Gonna be honest: especially considering how focused on the queens’ trajectories the critiques and deliberations are, I really don’t need this amount of recap. I continue to question the wisdom of doing a two-part finale, especially stretched across two weeks. Why not just give us one super-sized, 90-minute episode? There was enough content to fill that, but there isn’t for two full episodes.
But before too long, we arrive at the Slay It Forward Variety Extravaganza. As always, I lament that we’ve all but fully moved away from treating this as a talent show challenge. This is basically a “do your best Werq the World/RuPaul’s Drag Race Live number” challenge, which makes Shannel’s juggling act feel like an outlier. It’s a shame, because it’s a clear top two performance for me, and perhaps the best display of pure talent since Monét’s opera performance on All Stars 7. Alas, I’ll have to discuss the other numbers within the framework that this is about selling yourself and your brand in a lip sync performance, not through anything else.
With that framework in mind, I think everyone more or less does well here. Roxxxy’s is a bit of a miss, mostly because she hasn’t really made burlesque her brand on the show since her All Stars 2 talent show performance. (Which, I gasp as I remember, was eight years ago.) If she did a hairography-based number with lyrics about not being able to read the doll, she’d be in a much stronger position to win this challenge. Similarly, I think Gottmik’s is really interesting, but “punk rock” as a brand isn’t really what this challenge is looking for. She at least incorporates saying “no gorge,” but not singing live makes the hard rock performance feel a little muted.
It’s possible the queens weren’t permitted to sing live, I guess? Nina West’s number makes not a lick of sense without being sung live—it’s a cute-enough ditty about the power of drag, but it’s stylized as a musical theater number. If she sang it live, it would be a strong display of Nina’s brand and talents. As a lip sync, it just can’t compare to the dance-and-stunt theatrics of her competitors. I actually feel the same about Angeria’s “park-and-bark” number. There are ways for a park-and-bark lip sync to be impressive (remember Latrice Royale’s “(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman” lip sync in Season 4?), but this kind of variety number is something that would’ve worked better if she sang it. But she drops an “ug-a-lee bitch” in it, and if we’ve learned anything this season, nothing makes Ru and the judges laugh harder than that reference.
So now we come to the three queens who deliver what I would consider the best Werq the World-style numbers: Jorgeous, Plastique and Vanjie. Of these three, Jorgeous is my clear standout. The branding gags behind her number (“Your track record looks terrible!”) work well, and her dancing is as amazing as you’d expect. The final move, in which a dancer actually tosses her sliding across the stage, is a gag. Jorgeous would be in my personal top two alongside Shannel.
Plastique and Vanjie are both quite good, but I’d give the edge to Plastique. She does a number that synthesizes her love of cultural references, her fashion sense, her dancing abilities and her newfound comic sensibility to great effect. When she starts firing sparks out of her breastplate? Star power! Vanjie’s is perfectly Vanjie, a tribute to bodysuits dedicated to Michelle, but Plastique just gives me a bit more stagecraft.
The Grand Finale Eleganza runway mostly keeps my impressions the same. Everyone looks great, with Nina and Vanjie a bit behind the rest and Plastique and Roxxxy a bit ahead. Both Jorgeous and Shannel look fantastic, perfectly them, and I’d keep them in the top two slots. Alas, Ru feels differently, and Angeria and Vanjie are the top two. Honestly, these decisions feel more motivated by who the show wants to promote than anything else. Angeria is a Ru favourite, able to make him laugh so easily, and has an easily digestible brand. Vanjie is a superstar, one who has never made a finale despite her effortless charm. As someone who has wanted to see Drag Race find mechanisms to reward charismatic competitors, I should be happy about this … but I can’t help but be frustrated on Jorgeous’, Plastique’s and Shannel’s behalves.
The final three lip sync to Janet Jackson’s “Rhythm Nation,” and they all do well. No one delivers something we haven’t seen from them—we’ve seen them all lip sync a lot this season—but they all make a clear case that they’re a terrific entertainer and a worthy champion. And it’s that last bit I want to emphasize: everyone did well this season. I could make arguments for five or six of these queens to take home the crown, including everyone in our top three. None of the issues with this result have to do with anyone being undeserving, especially a queen as effortlessly entertaining and enjoyable as Angeria.
But I would argue Drag Race has a responsibility to edit the show to a satisfying and comprehensible outcome. Not just because they should be trying to make the best TV they can, although that’s part of it. More important is that these queens are all real people who have to contend with a fanbase that has repeatedly and consistently demonstrated itself to be volatile. If fans feel like they’ve been led to expect one outcome, and have the rug pulled out from under them at the last second, it’s natural that they’re going to be frustrated. This has, in the past, led to decidedly less natural reactions, like them sending hate to the queens involved. We can wish over and over again that the fans wouldn’t react that way, and Ru can tell the contestants to simply ignore them, but that’s idealistic. To paraphrase the politician who appeared at the very start of this episode: we exist in the context of this fandom and everything that has come before this season.
I hope reactions aren’t too volatile and that, even as we express disappointment that Roxxxy didn’t win—a result that felt so within our grasp—we can still celebrate our winner and this season. It hasn’t been a great run of episodes; I think the non-elimination format has to be permanently retired. (All Stars 10 format rumours indicate that, at least for now, it is indeed gone.) But there’s been a lot of great drag, and it’s been amazing to watch this group of queens grow together. I imagine I’ll revisit a lot of performances and looks from this season often. I’m not sure it’ll work that well as a season of television on a rewatch, though. The ending just feels a bit too disjointed compared to the story told for the whole run.
I’m leaving this season behind with two major thoughts in mind. One, I think the MTV era has pivoted hard away from obvious winner edits (Sasha Colby’s, Jimbo’s) toward unexpected results. A middle ground between the two would be better. Nymphia’s win arguably got the closest—if she hadn’t simply disappeared from the edit for the middle of the season, I think the contest between her and Sapphira would’ve been neck-and-neck both on a competitive and narrative level. Two, and I say this with all the love in my heart for seeing queens return to the show: I think it might be time to retire annual All Stars seasons. With Global All Stars and vs. The World seasons, there are more opportunities than ever to bring competitors back for another go. After All Stars 10, I wouldn’t mind a break from American All Stars seasons for a while.
Of course, I have no faith that World of Wonder and Paramount will want to take such a step. The Drag Race machine just keeps on moving forward. And as much as I may be skeptical of that, I’m the one tuning in for yet another Drag Race episode later tonight, plus Global All Stars when it premieres. If the machine is gonna keep churning, you’ll always find me watching. I just hope others keep watching, too.